Yatagarasu Series
Volume 1:
Ravens Shouldn't
Wear Kimono
Author: Chisato Abe
Part 5: A New Spring;
Section 2
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The Flower Ceremony was over. Everyone moved from the cherry blossom viewing stage to Wisteria Hall. Shiratama assumed her place weakly. Asebi sat in her assigned seat, silent. Nadeshiko looked around anxiously, clearly unsettled. Only Masuho no Susuki appeared calm as she sat down.
Every eye was fixed on the center of the hall. The Crown Prince sat there with Hamayū by his side. Like most of the other duchesses present, she appeared anxious. This wasn’t something she’d expected.
The Crown Prince himself was the stuff of dreams. His face was framed by raven-colored hair that captured the same shimmery purples and greens as his wings did when he transformed. His blue-violet eyes shone like polished amethysts. They held a piercing intensity that reflected his keen intellect and curiosity. He was the very image of a fair and noble prince.
For all that, the Crown Prince lacked ostentation of any sort. He was not gold, but steel. He was like a drawn blade ready to be used, not one of the ornamental swords in his father’s treasure room. There was a sharp, chilling air about him.
The Crown Prince glanced briefly at Takimoto. It was impossible to tell what he was thinking. He was so composed that Takimoto’s righteous indignation towards him appeared comical in comparison.
“What on earth is going on?” Takimoto asked. “How dare you appear in Sakura Palace in such fashion!”
The Crown Prince's lack of reply spoke louder than words. His gaze was utterly devoid of friendliness or even civility. Asebi wondered if he might be mocking Takimoto by his silence.
Takimoto lost her temper and shouted loudly, “You have ignored all of the required rituals of Sakura Palace from the very beginning, and now you choose to barge into the Flower Ceremony without any prior notice! There is a limit to how much you can disregard court tradition!”
The servants and ladies-in-waiting around her cowered in terror.
The Crown Prince himself was entirely at ease. It was like he couldn’t hear Takimoto shouting at him.
But he did hear, because he responded. “There was something more important than traditions to attend to,” he said. “My previous absences could not be helped. Isn’t that right, Duchess Masuho no Susuki?”
The ladies-in-waiting standing near Takimoto all turned toward a bamboo blind that concealed Masuho no Susuki and the attendants of the Autumn Hall. The bamboo blind was raised, revealing the Duchess of Saike.
“Your Imperial Highness,” Masuho no Susuki said, bowing her head in acknowledgment. Her face set in firm lines of determination. “I requested the Crown Prince’s presence here today. I considered it a matter of some urgency.”
“You, Duchess of the Autumn Hall?” Takimoto asked. Her eyes narrowed sharply. “You sent a letter directly to the Crown Prince without going through Wisteria Hall? You are aware that this is a violation of the rules, are you not?”
Masuho no Susuki didn’t answer.
Takimoto turned her attention to Hamayū. “And why,” she said, “is Hamayū, who was officially expelled from Sakura Palace, now a maid in the service of Saike?”
“I asked Sumio of the Yamauchishu to search for Hamayū,” Kikuno said. “I also asked Sumio to deliver my mistress’ letter to the Crown Prince. He performed both tasks admirably.”
“It is not particularly unusual for a duchess to employ a commoner maid, after all,” Masuho no Susuki added. “All I did was provide a common woman with a job. That’s not against any rule.”
Takimoto was about to protest, but then Hamayū spoke, and the hall went silent.
“Crown Prince,” Hamayū said in her usual voice: stern and strong.
The Crown Prince turned to her with a questioning look.
Hamayū spoke through clenched teeth. “Masuho no Susuki is not at fault,” she said. “The truth is that I forced my way back into Sakura Palace without assistance from anyone else. I am nothing but a burden. I apologize.”
“Oh?” the Crown Prince asked. “For what?”
“I have run around recklessly and caused trouble for Duchess Masuho no Susuki,” she said.
“You did not commit any crime deserving punishment, did you?”
Hamayū gasped.
Wisteria Hall was so quiet that a pin dropping would be audible.
“What nonsense,” Takimoto said. “Are you saying that stealing the letters addressed to the other duchesses from the Crown Prince was not a crime?”
“That is indeed a crime. But Hamayū didn’t do it,” the Crown Prince said.
Most of those present didn’t understand what the Crown Prince meant.
Resisting the pressure of the hall’s all-seeing gaze, Hamayū shook her head firmly. “No, I did it.”
“There is no need to tell such pointless lies now,” Masuho no Susuki said, exasperated. “I knew all along that you could not have done such a thing. You would know why if you thought through how it would be possible to steal such letters in the first place.”
“That’s right,” the Crown Prince said. “My letters pass from my hand to that of one of my servants. It is then delivered to the duchess I have written to. Where in this chain of custody would it be possible to steal my letters?” He sighed softly, and then lifted his head. “There is only one person who could have intercepted the letters. It was you, wasn’t it, Fujinami?”
As the ladies-in-waiting in the hall all gasped in unison, the young prince looked up toward the entrance of Wisteria Hall. Princess Fujinami stood there, her lips trembling.
Compared to when Asebi and the others had first entered the palace a year ago, she had become so thin that the difference was obvious at a glance. Her eyes were sunken and fearful. She appeared terrified of the Crown Prince.
“Brother…”
“No, Princess Fujinami, you mustn’t say anything!” Takimoto cried out, rushing over to her.
Fujinami staggered toward her brother as if she didn’t notice Takimoto’s presence. “Brother, I… I…” Unable to bear his emotionless gaze any longer, Fujinami broke down in tears. Takimoto gently embraced her, shielding her from her brother’s eyes.
“Take care of her until she calms down,” the Crown Prince said tonelessly.
Takimoto chose not to respond to him in any way. She half-carried Princess Fujinami over to a corner and arranged bamboo screens around the weeping princess for privacy. Fujinami’s attendants gathered around her.
“Why?” Chanohana asked. “Why would Princess Fujinami do such a thing? And if it’s true, then why would that woman try to take the blame for Princess Fujinami?”
The Crown Prince frowned when Chanohana referred to Hamayū as “that woman.”
Chanohana’s shoulders shook, but she did not avert her gaze from the Crown Prince.
“Setting aside the question of why Fujinami did it, I understand why Hamayū tried to protect her. She wasn’t trying to protect Fujinami, but someone else.”
“Someone else?”
“Yes,” Masuho no Susuki said. “Me. She was protecting me.” She placed one splayed hand over her heart.
“Duchess Masuho no Susuki?” Chanohana asked.
The Crown Prince sighed and gestured for Masuho no Susuki to speak.
“It doesn’t matter as much in Sakura Palace,” Masuho no Susuki said, “but within the imperial court, the lineage of duchesses is regarded as quite important. The responsibility for the scandal caused by Fujinami does not fall on the imperial family, but instead on her maternal family—that is, the Saike family. My family.” She bowed her head slightly and then looked up. “In other words, Hamayū has been trying to eliminate any factors that could put me at a disadvantage within the imperial court. She has done that for the past year.”
Hamayū gave Masuho no Susuki a flat glare that said without words, I wish you hadn’t said that. You always say unnecessary things.
“I didn’t take the blame to protect you,” Hamayū said.
“But that must be the reason why you decided to take the blame,” the Crown Prince said bluntly, as if urging her to admit everything already.
“Anyone with some sense would realize that the incident with the letter was Fujinami’s doing. When your own status was exposed, you allowed Takimoto to put the blame on you. It seems that Takimoto was having trouble dealing with the stolen letters anyway, so it was a convenient solution.”
From behind the screens where Fujinami sat, quiet sobbing could be heard.
Takimoto said nothing.
Silence was affirmation.
“Hamayū, why did you help me?” Masuho no Susuki asked. “You had no reason to. I don’t understand why you would go to all this trouble.”
“A reasonable question,” the Crown Prince muttered. “If I may speak without fear of misunderstanding… No, actually,” the young prince corrected himself in a low voice. “There’s no misunderstanding at all. It was all for my sake.”
Hamayū leaped to her feet, making a thunderous sound in the hall’s stillness. Startled, everyone turned to look at her.
Pale as a sheet and shaking with rage, Hamayū said, “Don’t be so conceited! For your sake? You and I didn’t even meet until today!”
Her furious shout vibrated in the air. It was so violent that Asebi thought she saw the pillars of the hall trembling.
The Crown Prince closed his eyes briefly and took a deep breath. He let Hamayū’s anger pass over him, then raised his eyebrows and looked back at her.
“Did you really think I wouldn’t notice, you hopeless fool?” he asked.
Hamayū froze. Her eyes widened and her lips trembled in disbelief. “You… it can’t be…”
“We’ll talk about the past later.”
The Crown Prince faced the stunned Chanohana and pointed at Hamayū. “We’ve known one another for some time. Hamayū has been working to help Masuho no Susuki marry into the imperial family from the start.” He shrugged, adding, “Protecting Fujinami was also part of that plan. Judging from the political situation, she must have thought that having Masuho no Susuki enter the imperial palace would be the best thing for me. Everyone gets confused because they only think about their own family. Have any of you ever considered things from my perspective, even once? Simply put, the best choice for me would be to make the Duchess of Saike the Princess of Sakura Palace.”
“If Hamayū had been chosen, the Crown Prince would certainly have been killed by agents of Nanke,” Masuho no Susuki said. “When I was informed that Nanke was seriously targeting the Crown Prince’s life, I finally understood Hamayū’s true intentions.”
Noting the contradiction in her explanation—Hamayū was of the Nanke family—she kept speaking quietly, matching the Crown Prince’s steely calm. “If their goal was to disinherit him, there would be no reason to go through the troublesome process of interfering with the other families. The simplest way for Nanke to achieve their goals would be to have their own duchess wed the Crown Prince. They would place an assassin among her attendants, and the deed would be as good as done.”
“That is why Hamayū behaved in ways unbecoming of a noble lady,” the Crown Prince said. “She tried to ruin Nanke’s reputation to avoid being chosen. She wanted to prevent her own lady-in-waiting, who is the assassin, from getting close to me. Isn’t that right, Karamushi?”
With a smile that was almost frightening, the Crown Prince looked toward the bamboo screen concealing the attendants of the Summer Hall from view. Karamushi stood before the bamboo screen, silent and attentive.
“Until then, Hamayū had pretended to be a perfect noble lady who was skilled at playing the lute. She seemed like a sheltered noblewoman, but the moment she entered the palace, her true nature was revealed. That must have surprised you.”
“What are you talking about, Your Imperial Highness?” Karamushi asked. She feigned calm, but her voice broke on the last word.
The Crown Prince’s smile did not reach his eyes. “Hamayū’s defiance must have been unexpected for both you and your true master. To prevent harm from coming to the duchesses of the other families, Hamayū didn’t attend any musical events and avoided appearing in public with the others.”
Hamayū had been thorough. She’d done all she could to keep the Crown Prince and the other duchesses safe.
“Touke does not need to gain political power by wedding their duchess to me,” the Crown Prince said. “Neither does Hokke. Hokke would consider it an honor and a prize if I were to choose their duchess, but they have no ambition or backing to use their duchess’ position to leverage their own power. My mother was a Saike, so it would make sense for me to choose to side with my own family for the sake of my personal safety.”
That was why Hamayū had worked to give Masuho no Susuki an advantage against the other duchesses.
The Crown Prince glanced at Hamayū. She stood near him with her head lowered, biting her lip.
Masuho no Susuki addressed the Crown Prince. “Your Imperial Highness, do you intend to wed Hamayū?”
Hamayū had done more for the Crown Prince’s sake than any other duchess, including herself. Masuho no Susuki could not fault Hamayū’s dedication or her courage. It would make sense to her if the Crown Prince chose Hamayū as his bride.
That is still undecided,” the Crown Prince said. “Frankly, that reasoning doesn’t make sense. She helped me, yes, but that doesn’t mean I have to make her my wife.”
Many people were taken aback by his cold, indifferent tone. Hamayū hadn’t been ordered to help or protect the Crown Prince; she’d done it of her own free will. Shouldn’t that count for something?
“But…” As Masuho no Susuki spoke, she realized there was something she hadn’t asked yet. Something she would have wanted to know first if Hamayū’s presence here hadn’t distracted her.
“Your Imperial Highness,” she said.
“Duchess of Saike.” The Crown Prince straightened his posture.
“Why did you avoid coming to Sakura Palace?” she asked.
“Because I saw no need to be here,” he said. The answer was quick and easy; he didn’t pause to consider it.
Masuho no Susuki was speechless.
The Crown Prince looked at her with a little frown. “Is there something wrong?” He seemed completely unbothered, as if there was nothing odd about his answer. His rock-solid composure left Masuho no Susuki unsure of what to say.
“That is… it is tradition for the Crown Prince to attend events and festivals held at Sakura Palace,” Masuho no Susuki said. “Isn’t that how the Princess of Sakura Palace is typically chosen? How can you choose a bride without spending time with the duchesses here?”
“Ah,” the Crown Prince said. “An interesting point. It is true that I have come to Sakura Palace before this year, but never with the intent of choosing a bride. The only thing that matters is what benefits me and what brings me disadvantage. That’s all. If I thought that I could choose my Empress by visiting you all and spending time with you, I would do that. But I don’t. That’s why I skipped most of the festivals in the past year.”
Masuho no Susuki locked eyes with the Crown Prince. She swallowed nervously and then said, “If that is so, why have the duchesses come here at all? They have all dreamed of marrying you, Your Imperial Highness. They have worked hard to be worthy of you and have eagerly awaited your visits. Isn’t it cruel not to visit them—not once in a whole year?” Her tone was mildly reproachful. She, too, had longed to get a visit from him, and she’d been spurned just like the other duchesses.
“Oh,” the Crown Prince said, nodding to himself. He raised one knee up slightly as he leaned forward. “It seems to me that you are misunderstanding a few things, Duchess Masuho no Susuki.”
“Misunderstanding?” Masuho no Susuki frowned. She wondered what he would say now. He’d said so many unexpected things.
The Crown Prince gave her a cold smile. “First, there’s something I’d like to ask you. What do you think of Sakura Palace? What kind of place is it to you?”
Masuho no Susuki was taken aback. Sakura Palace had been her residence for an entire year. “What kind of question is that?” she asked. She straightened her back, puffed out her chest and said, “Sakura Palace is a place where the duchesses from four imperial branch families can deepen their friendships while striving to become women worthy of the Crown Prince. We polish each other, enhancing one another’s virtues and skills.”
“Dead wrong,” the Crown Prince said. “That’s not at all what Sakura Palace is for.”
Masuho no Susuki flushed red. She had answered so confidently, and yet the Crown Prince had dismissed her bold answer.
“Then what is it for?” she asked, her tone tinged with resentment and a bit of sharpness.
The Crown Prince didn’t seem to mind her change in attitude. He raised one finger, saying, “All that talk about improving oneself and so on—none of it has any real meaning. If that were truly the case, then it wouldn’t matter at all whether I was here or not, would it?”
“That’s not right at all! We improve ourselves to become worthy of you, Your Imperial Highness.”
“You’re talking in circles. Stop it. It seems like there is only one thing that truly matters to you,” the Crown Prince said, his gaze sharpening. “To be chosen as my bride. Isn’t that all there is to it?” he asked. His words were sharper than his eyes.
Masuho no Susuki flinched.
“I don’t know what you were thinking when you entered Sakura Palace,” the Crown Prince said. “I can’t read your mind. But Sakura Palace only exists for one reason. Sakura Palace is where the Golden Raven chooses his Red Raven. There have been no exceptions to that rule—not ever.” He paused. “Of course, each Golden Raven has different tastes. Different preferences. The experiences aren’t the same, but the act of choosing is. Some Golden Ravens sought beautiful women, while others looked for sincerity. I never wanted either of those things.” He shook his head. “It’s pointless if you put effort into the wrong things, like trying to improve yourself in ways that don’t matter. I have no interest in your personal ambitions or intentions.”
The Crown Prince turned his chilling smile on Masuho no Susuki. “If I want a beautiful woman, I can go down to the pleasure quarters. If I wanted a sincere wife, I would have already left the palace to find one. The reason I insist on choosing from among the duchesses of Sakura Palace is because I require someone with all of the qualities necessary to become Empress. No matter how beautiful or good-natured someone may be, those things are completely worthless to me.”
His piercing stare fell upon Masuho no Susuki. He looked at her like she was uncommonly transparent to him. Like everyone was.
“I have always paid attention to matters in Sakura Palace, but that was not because I intended to choose a wife based on her appearance or disposition. That’s why I never felt the need to visit directly. In fact, you could say that by not coming here, I was testing you all to see who truly possessed the necessary qualities. That might be easier to understand.”
“You were testing us,” Masuho no Susuki said flatly.
The Crown Prince showed no emotion. “Yes, that’s right.”
“I can’t believe it. You’re the worst. The lowest of the low.”
“I don’t know what kind of dreams you had about me, but I have no time to play along with your childish games. Just because your fantasies are different from reality doesn’t mean you should complain. You have no right to complain about anything.”
Masuho no Susuki’s fury rose to her throat. “Childish games? How absurd! Everyone was doing their best! Poor Shiratama lost her mind from all of this. Hamayū might not have been driven out of Sakura Palace if things had been different.”
“Let me ask you then,” the Crown Prince said. Masuho no Susuki bothered him as much as everything else: that is to say, not at all. “Do you think I should have kept visiting Sakura Palace even though I had no reason to? Wouldn’t that have been dishonest? Do you think someone who can’t endure my absence now would be able to endure it after entering the imperial court? Even after marriage, I wouldn’t go to my wife’s chambers unless I had a good reason to. A woman who throws a tantrum because I’m not always with her is a nuisance, not an asset.” He shook his head. “No. What I sought from you duchesses was strong conviction in the face of adversity. I need an Empress who can fulfill her duties, no matter how difficult they are. The Lords of Nanke, Saike, Hokke and Touke should have known this. They should have sent a duchess here who has perseverance above all else. Good looks are a waste in this case.”
The Crown Prince turned slightly toward Hamayū. “As to your other question about Hamayū…” His tone softened slightly.
“What about it?” Masuho no Susuki asked.
“I don’t particularly mind if it’s you instead.”
Masuho no Susuki frowned, not understanding what he meant.
“In other words, I’m saying that I wouldn’t mind if you were the one to enter the imperial court.”
For a moment, the serious-faced Crown Prince looked like an incomprehensible monster to Masuho no Susuki.
Even when faced with such an openly unsettled gaze, the Crown Prince showed no sign of agitation. “You were able to wait for me without complaint. You knew how to act when necessary. Hamayū must have chosen to protect you because she saw your potential. She wanted me to choose you.”
The Crown Prince smiled as he laid out Hamayū’s logic in his own words. “So, what do you think? You haven’t answered. Are you considering the political implications of your decision?” He looked at Hamayū, and his smile changed to something warmer, almost playful. “In recognition of her devotion, I think it would be acceptable to make you my wife.” He faced Masuho no Susuki again. “So what do you say, Duchess of Saike? Would you consider becoming my bride?”
If the Crown Prince had asked Masuho no Susuki the same question an hour ago, she would have been overjoyed. But now, she hesitated.
“I… When we were children, I always thought you loved me.”
“You’re not wrong. I still love you.” He said this easily in front of the other duchesses as if he didn’t care what they thought.
I love him. I’ve always loved him, Masuho no Susuki thought. But… it’s not the same.
“The love I have for you and the love you have for me are different things,” Masuho no Susuki said.
“Of course they are. That’s obvious.” Masuho no Susuki still didn’t understand him. He sighed and then said, “You are the eldest daughter of the Lord of Saike. I do not have any special feelings for you, nor am I in love with you. That will not change even if we marry. I have no intention of granting special treatment to the Saike family because of you. In the future, if necessary, I will take as many concubines as I wish, and depending on the situation, I may even cast you aside.
“I will not allow you to complain, nor will I permit you to become intimately involved with any man other than myself. Suppress your own desires, and live solely for my sake. If you are prepared to accept all of this, I will take you as my wife. Choose for yourself.” His smile was still in place, but his eyes were cold.
Masuho no Susuki raised one slender hand. “Give me a knife,” she said loudly enough for everyone in the hall to hear her.
The women standing closest to the Saike duchess recoiled in shock. Masuho no Susuki cast an exasperated glance at Kikuno, who was too stunned to move. She leaned forward and casually drew out a knife from the folds of Kikuno’s kimono.
“Duchess!”
“What are you shouting for? It’s not as if I’m going to attack the Crown Prince,” she said. She glared at the Crown Prince, gripping the knife’s hilt in one hand. “This is what I’m going to do.”
She brought the edge of the blade down on her long hair, chopping long chunks off of her head. She was unaccustomed to handling blades, so her glossy hair did not cut easily. It fell in clumps onto her cheeks before sliding onto the floor.
Kikuno was beside herself with shock. Her face froze in terror.
Hamayū rushed forward and took the knife away, but by then, Masuho no Susuki had cut off most of her hair.
Masuho no Susuki gave her head a light shake. She looked down at her hair on the floor and grinned in satisfaction. “Crown Prince,” she said, “I sincerely appreciate your proposal, but I’m afraid I must decline. Even if you order me to wed you, I have just pledged myself to the mountain god, so I am no longer in a position to accept.”
Locks of her red-black hair fell over her indigo skirt, making a subtle pattern on the fabric. Masuho no Susuki without her hair was a sorrowful sight. She was smiling, but she appeared bereft.
“You are truly determined. You didn’t have to go that far,” the Crown Prince said. His expression hadn’t changed as she’d cut her hair off, but now he appeared genuinely impressed.
The women gathered in Wisteria Hall gave Masuho no Susuki looks of disbelief, disgust or shock, but the Crown Prince didn’t seem the least bit surprised.
Hamayū was a bit unsteady on her feet. She looked back and forth between Masuho no Susuki and the Crown Prince, stunned. “Why?” she asked quietly.
Masuho no Susuki gave the former Nanke duchess a sympathetic glance.
“Why, Masuho no Susuki?” Hamayū asked, her voice rising until she was shouting. “Didn’t you want to marry the Crown Prince? Isn’t this what you wanted? Why didn’t you just say yes?!” Hamayū rocked back and forth on her feet as her words coursed through her uncontrolled.
Masuho no Susuki closed her eyes and sighed deeply. “I understand now, Hamayū. I never had any chance of wedding the Crown Prince. Neither did Asebi or Shiratama. You were always the only choice.”
Hamayū stared at her, wide-eyed with confusion.
“There are very few people who are as selfless as you,” Masuho no Susuki said. “You are the one who has the qualities that the Crown Prince requires.”
Hamayū stood still, uncomprehending to the point of terror. She was grieving on her feet—for herself or Masuho no Susuki, she wasn’t sure.
Masuho no Susuki shifted her attention to the Crown Prince. “Your Imperial Highness, I believe that there is no one else to choose but Duchess Hamayū. If she becomes your bride, I will enter her service as a lady-in-waiting.”
“Duchess!” Kikuno cried out. She threw up her hands and tore at her own hair.
Masuho no Susuki ignored Kikuno. “I’ve already made up my mind,” she said, turning away from her loyal attendant. She was in no mood to argue.
The crowd was growing restless. Chanohana pushed to the front of it and pitched her voice to carry. “I don’t understand any of this at all! It is unthinkable for the daughter of a criminal and a traitor to enter the imperial court. And to make matters worse, a duchess of good family and good standing is to be her attendant?”
Masuho no Susuki laughed at Chanohana’s outburst. “What does family status matter now? To me, personal pride is far more important than upholding my family’s honor. I have made a mistake, and I cannot just return home without taking some responsibility for it. My own sense of honor will not permit that. This is my way of atoning for my mistake. There is no reason for my father or my brother to interfere here.”
The Saike duchess stood near the center of the hall, straight-backed and courageous. She had shed her old self, and her new self was rising like a phoenix. Her self-confident smile made her more beautiful than ever, even with her hair chopped short.
The Crown Prince was immovable: a statue made flesh. Even Masuho no Susuki’s incredible resolve and personal transformation were not enough to shake his essential composure. He interrupted Masuho no Susuki and Chanohana with all the bluntness of a bludgeon.
“I haven’t said that I would make Hamayū my wife,” he said. “Not even once. I don’t intend to choose a wife because of anyone’s prevailing opinion. I won’t be swayed by your emotional arguments, either, Masuho no Susuki.”
The mood in Wisteria Hall became a bit more subdued as ladies-in-waiting and attendants calmed down. Hamayū wouldn’t be marrying the Crown Prince. That decision seemed wise to almost everyone.
Hamayū appeared openly relieved. “Masuho no Susuki, I appreciate your words, but the Crown Prince is right.”
“See?” the Crown Prince asked. “Hamayū understands me. No matter how much you ask her to wed me, she won’t agree. Now, there’s something else I’d like to discuss, if I may.” He gestured to one of the bamboo blinds, ordering it to be raised.
After a brief hesitation, Chanohana quietly complied.
Shiratama lay flat on the other side of the bamboo blind. All the strength had gone out of her limbs. She was dressed for the Flower Ceremony in a scarlet unlined kimono worn under a richly patterned karaginu. The karaginu was adorned with shining silver embroidery like waves of water. The Hokke duchess’ garments swallowed her, making her appear frail and diminished.
Shiratama had kept silent since entering Wisteria Hall. She hadn’t moved a muscle. Her eyes found the Crown Prince. She stumbled gracelessly to her feet and bowed.
“Duchess Shiratama,” the Crown Prince said, “have you ever seen a commoner married couple?”
Chanohana appeared puzzled. “No, of course she hasn’t seen that—”
“—I was asking the duchess,” the Crown Prince said, cutting Chanohana off sternly.
Pressed to respond, Shiratama lowered her gaze. She turned her head back and forth sluggishly. She said nothing.
“I see,” the Crown Prince said. He nodded. When he spoke again, his words were softer and kinder than the ones he’d hurled at Masuho no Susuki. “I have. You should know that commoners don’t have a single silk garment like the ones you and I wear every day. Most of them don’t have their own homes to sleep in at night. They transform into ravens in the evening and huddle together on a tree branch for warmth. That tree becomes their roost. Winters are especially hard for them, but they don’t complain. And why not? I’ve heard that they stay strong because they have a steadfast partner by their side, so they’re able to endure anything. Don’t you think that’s admirable?”
Shiratama remained silent. After the Crown Prince said nothing for a time, she nodded in agreement.
“Which is colder, I wonder: sleeping alone while gazing at the moon from a soft bed or sleeping together with someone in a tree in winter?” The Crown Prince smiled gently at Shiratama. “Do you know the answer? I think you might.”
Shiratama lifted her head slowly. Her cheeks were gaunt and her eyes were sunken. She was exhausted; she had lost so much of who she’d been. “Your Imperial Highness, I no longer have a steadfast partner by my side, and I fear I never will again.”
“Oh? Is that so?” The Crown Prince spoke more firmly now. “I think you’re a greedy woman, and there’s nothing redeeming about that greed. Everything you’ve ever permitted yourself to want is for the sake of your family’s future. Shouldn’t you be greedy for what you actually want? Isn’t it time you were honest about your own feelings?”
“You don’t understand,” Shiratama said, shaking her head in resignation. “I was born solely for the purpose of entering the imperial court. I should have lived my life as just another noble lady. I was picked up in childhood by the Lord of Hokke. I was given many luxuries because people expected me to become the Empress. I cannot repay my family for all their care if I do not fulfill their desire.”
“Is that all you wanted to say?” the Crown Prince asked mercilessly. “Your reasoning is invalid. So what if expectations were placed on you and you could not enter the imperial court? That only means that the Lord of Hokke misjudged your potential. It is not your responsibility to please him.”
Shiratama opened her mouth to say something and then closed it.
The Crown Prince continued speaking. “You talk of luxuries, but not happiness. You are missing out on a life of happiness in exchange for material comfort. Do you think that’s a fair trade? If you’re willing to give up your own happiness for wealth, then you have no right to complain.” He looked Shiratama up and down. “You should have admitted that you were not happy. You should have taken action to secure your own future. You could have spoken to the Lord of Hokke, or to your mother if the lord intimidated you. You could have voiced your complaints to someone. You did not. You chose to ignore your feelings and give up on expressing them because you believed there was no chance of happiness in your life. You live trapped between heaven and earth, longing for the sky but stuck forever on the ground. You likely thought that expressing your desires would trouble the Lord of Hokke. You feared making waves and getting in trouble. You’ve always gone along to get along. You’ve never done a single thing to change your own life.”
Shiratama collapsed to her knees. She made a sound between a sigh and a scream and buried her face in her hands.
“Duchess Shiratama!” Chanohana cried out in alarm.
The Crown Prince continued speaking as if Shiratama had not collapsed. He showed no concern for the overstrained Duchess of Hokke. “Let me ask you this, Duchess Shiratama. Are you prepared to become my wife? You have come this far without doing anything, without even trying to do anything. Whether you were passive or not, that was by your own will. Now, if you wish it, I will take you as my wife. If you become my wife, I will not grant any special favors to Hokke. The Lord of Hokke’s scheme will come to nothing, but you will be able to fulfill your duty. Is this not what you have wished for?”
“Please stop this!” Chanohana was in tears. She prostrated herself at the Crown Prince’s feet. “Please, please, no more… Duchess Shiratama bears no blame. The fault for everything lies with me, Chanohana.”
The Crown Prince remained cold and unfeeling. “You have indulged your mistress’ worst instincts. I believe that. But why should she escape responsibility for her actions now? She has run from responsibility for her whole life. She cannot run from it now.” He shifted his gaze to Shiratama again.
“You said there was no longer a steadfast partner by your side, but isn’t there someone?” he asked. “You carry them within you.”
Shiratama went whiter than her namesake.
The Crown Prince raised an eyebrow. “You haven’t figured that out yet? It’s obvious. It’s already grown too large for you to get rid of it easily. I don’t particularly care about virginal purity, but even so, you cannot possibly enter the imperial court in your condition. That simply isn’t possible. If you intend to become my bride, you must dispose of the child while it is still an egg—with your own hands.”
Shiratama stood up suddenly, energized by shame or anger. “The child… what are you saying?” she asked. She hunched her shoulders, instinctively protecting her stomach. “No, absolutely not! I can’t! I will not lose Kazumi again. I will never enter the imperial court!” she shouted in rage. “I will protect this child, even if it means running to the ends of the earth! Don’t touch me!”
Shiratama fled at full speed.
Before she left the hall, Shiratama noticed that the Crown Prince was looking at her warmly. His unusual, mercurial kindness had returned.
Shiratama faltered in her flight, breathing heavily.
The Crown Prince smiled at her. His former cruelty seemed like a lie. “At last, you have made your own choice. Perhaps the first true choice you have ever made. Well then, let me give you a gift.”
“A gift?” Shiratama made no effort to hide her skepticism.
The Crown Prince nodded. “Come in,” he said loudly.
Everyone present wondered who he was speaking to and what was about to happen.
A man entered Wisteria Hall, flanked on both sides by imperial attendants. He wore a matching set of ocher court clothes and his hair was neatly arranged. He was taller and slimmer than the Crown Prince.
He had eyes only for Shiratama. “Shiratama…”
Shiratama saw his face and wept.
The crowd’s attention was on Shiratama.
The Duchess of Hokke stood at the edge of Wisteria Hall, open-mouthed with tears falling down her face and onto the wooden floor. “Kazumi?” she asked so softly that the young man before her barely heard her.
“Shiratama!” He rushed forward, embracing her. She remained rigid in his arms.
“Kazumi?”
Kazumi’s hands moved up and down her back to soothe her. He was crying now, too, though he was trying to hold in his tears. “I’m sorry for making you worry,” he said. “But His Imperial Highness protected me, you see.”
“Kazumi, Kazumi, Kazumi,” Shiratama repeated over and over. “No. This is a lie. Or a dream. Are you really Kazumi?”
“Yes, yes, it’s me.” Kazumi nodded.
While everyone else watched in stunned silence, Hamayū quietly approached the Crown Prince and whispered, “Is Shiratama really pregnant?”
“No,” he whispered back. Shiratama and Kazumi hadn’t done anything that would result in a child. “But she seemed pretty confused, and I thought that might be the final push she needed.”
“I thought as much,” Hamayū said. She withdrew, returning to her own chair.
Chanohana was more shocked than anyone. She watched Shiratama cling to Kazumi in bewilderment.
“What on earth is going on?” she asked, rubbing her forehead in frustration.
The Crown Prince took in his audience, sweeping his gaze over the assembled duchesses and ladies-in-waiting. Then he stood up. “Duchess of the Spring Hall,” he said.
Wisteria Hall fell silent again.
“Yes, Your Imperial Highness?” Duchess Asebi asked from behind bamboo blinds.
“May I have a moment of your time?”
There was a silence, and then the bamboo blinds concealing Asebi were hurriedly raised. Asebi sat in her place in a daze. She had no idea why the Crown Prince wished to speak to her.
“Please go,” Ukogi said, her expression tense as she rolled up the blinds.
Asebi looked to the Crown Prince, confused and uncertain.
The Crown Prince nodded indulgently. “Let us go out to the courtyard together,” he said. “I have wanted to speak with you for some time.” He turned his back to Asebi and headed toward the courtyard outside Wisteria Hall.
Ukogi’s earnest expectations weighed Asebi down as she pressed a hand to her pounding heart and followed after the Crown Prince.
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